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Tuesday, October 27, 2009

DEAR YAYAH,

...I don't know how to begin myy life right now everything is a messed..i feel i lost myy family myy close friends and soonn maybe myy loves oness. i've broken promises, i've hurt ppl..i make people's life difficult. i don't even know who i am anymore. i make mistakes i did it again will i ever learnt myy mistakes...yayah..?

In the year 2009 gives alot of lessons to me, change myy whole life the way i look at things, i'm becoming a materialistic girl.i never could have imagine lying to myy mum..i've alwaes the troublemaker at home..one after another.myy problems now is overwhelming which is too much i can't take it. it's alwaes about me.but year 2009 have opened my eyes ,the people around me positive and negative.Because of the problems i have...i started to be pessismistic..

i did something i shouldn't have done...which leave scars in myy whole life..has a big impact in myy life...and todae i went home at 5pm..break myy fast..and prayed...after a minute something came to myy mind like a lightbulb..i thought of making chocolates and sell it to earn money to pay myy mum..of her hardwork...

The story goes like this....on sunday i was supposed to cut myy hair as i don't have the money so she came to me...i was disappointed...she gave me the moneyy...but i have other plans to go with myy friend and cut myy hair for free...i agreed before that..made up a promise with her and i end up breaking it..=(i hurt her..in other words.)so i didn't cut myy hair just thin...i made a huge mistake a foolish thing..i didn't know it cost till $16..i was shocked...thinking abt myy allowance for the week.and how do i explain .I made a reallie bad decision. which i can't forgive myself..

yayahh...inikah balasan ku..atau just a test to me...??i'm reallie tired...i've tried everyway to change myself...idk...yayahh...setiap kali ku dengar lagu"send it on"...by stars of disney channel reallie makes myy dayy...gives me another chance to live myy life again and forgive myyself and never look backk...move on...and the next dayy will be a better dayy..yayahhh...

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Blogged @ 4:32 AM
Don't let me go -

Friday, October 23, 2009

wannt photoss...in myy bloggg...wait long longgg...!!!!hahaha LOL..will upload soonn...if i have tyme larhhh...=P gtg...muackss...

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Blogged @ 8:11 AM
Don't let me go -


Through the wind i hear yewr voice in the clouds i see ur name living life without yew just wouldnt be the same...!=(everytime we touch i get this feellling everytime we kissed i swear i could fly...can yew feel my beat fast..i want this to last..)hahaha...

love love love....!!!!!how can i ever define...love..?beautiful nice feeling...?idk..yayahhhh....for the first time...i felt better than yesterdayy...myy mood is "evacuate the dancefloor"...!i wanna sing and dance to the beat....yayahhh nak join...guysss don't read thiss...thiss is just so sooo ....piece of nothing...i'm nt supposed to blog since i have nothing to write...bt bt...im waiting for callsss...so it's like while waiting...hahaha...todayyy i contact myy dear lost long friendd...haha...she vanish and she's back againn...hoping to meet her soonnn..coz i have alllottt of stories to share with herrr...gerltalkks..fer like monthsss weekkks...how i miss yew...!

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Blogged @ 7:46 AM
Don't let me go -

Thursday, October 22, 2009

DEAR YAYAH,

takkan mungkin kita bertahan hidup dalam bersendirian panas terik hujan badai kita lalui bersama.

Ku menangis membayangkan betapa kejamnya dirimu atas diriku kau duakan cinta ini kau pergi bersamanya..ku menangis melepaskan kepergian dirimu dari sisiku hidupku harus kau slalu tau akulah hati yang kau sakiti..!

yayah...ku hilang seorang kawan rapatku...yang ku panggil kawan selamanya...kawan menangis kawan ketaweku...haizz..cepatnyer setahun berlalu...dulu kau cakap..we will be bestfriends forever and no one can stand between us..or make us an enemy...or to be far apart..yes i valued i treasured our friendship..but yew hurt me in many wayss...hmmm..tapi tkpe...i noe all of us make new friends...so i'm okae she's okae...=)make mii dae ppl!hahaha

cintaku bukan di atas kertas cintaku geteran yang sama tk perlu dipaksa tk perlu dicari kerna ku yakin ada jawabnya...)hehe..nadiah is simply bored..i cant'sleep..insomnia..?hahaha..jk..

best erhh...main bunga api dat there ..thanx yew guys i had myy funn...yew make mii dayy..alwaes n ever gerlfrienzz...!!haha...hmm...aites nantok erhh penat babe!be right back...=)

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Blogged @ 7:12 AM
Don't let me go -

Sunday, October 18, 2009

DEAR YAYAH,

i'm back..okays..to my chinese friends sorie..guess yew didn't understand my blog because i was speaking in malay in my blog..ppl the reason i'm not updating myy blog is i don't have anything to write at the moment.=) knowing that sch starts..so u noe i noe..everybody's noes..k..?hehe

yayah, there is alot of things that goes wrong in myy life..my relationship with myy family we arent' communicating well..i felt distance i don't know whyy...wen yew feel like yew are goin further and further away wen u no longer knowss wat happen at home..all stuffs..=(

i hate to sae this but i tink i don't even know myselff anymore..it's like i've change to someone i don't know..it's not about growing up change...it's about not being urself...because of yewr attitude ur character...everything...i have a hard tyme sleeping..yew may sae..if i have a problems i could turn to myy parents..it's easy for yew to sae that..but i've tried speaking to them but the kind of reply i get....!very dissapointing. i constantly had a fight with myy sister..like i get easily irritated...what about the time i kept quiet at home..doesn't myy body language..speaks..?can't u even realised that...i have a hard time approaching parents it's just too late..!u'll never understand...

yayah...this is almost the longest entry i've write so far..well a friends onces told me :"to be hurt yew noe what is the meaning of life."sorie yayah...i'm reallie tired...but i knw tmr will be a better dae..xoxo yayah..

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Blogged @ 4:01 AM
Don't let me go -